Police say domestic abuse is under reported. CHARLOTTE McDONALD attends a meeting to learn how victims can get help.

WHEN Bromley’s only women’s refuge started up 35 years ago, domestic violence was barely recognised as a crime.

So says Teri Moore who works for Bromley Women’s Aid which runs refuges and gives support to women in the borough.

Speaking at a Bromley Community Engagement Forum meeting organised to talk about the issue, she said: “Unfortunately we have six refuges in the borough and unfortunately we need more.”

She said:”We provide outreach work. It’s about making people aware of their options.

“It’s not just about saying ‘oh yeah he’s a rotter, come to a refuge.’”

“If they come here, there are workers who help them find new schools for their children and housing.”

But coming to a refuge would be the last resort.

It has been estimated that on average a woman will be assaulted or abused 35 times before she will report it.

Though it isn’t just women who are affected.

Bromley police’s head of community safety, DI Paul White, told the forum that officers classed all abuse in the home- mental as well as physical- as domestic abuse, whether it was between parents and children or between partners.

Many agencies offer support to victims in Bromley.

WHERE TO GET HELP: - Text the Bromley Domestic Abuse textline for help and advice- 07963 479602.

- Call the Bromley Victim Support helpline- you do not need to have reported an incident to the police. Call 020 8776 7071.

- Visit a One-Stop-Shop where people can go along to get confidential help and advice.

In Penge at the Citizens Advice Bureau in Snowdown Close on Tuesdays between 9.30am and 12.30pm or in Bromley at Community House in South Street on Thursdays between 1.30pm and 4pm.

- Police have trained officers to deal with victims of domestic abuse. Call 020 8284 8760.

- Bromley Women’s Aid run refuges for women escaping domestic abuse as well as giving advice. Call 020 8313 9303.

- To get extra security for homes against ex-partners- such as reinforced doors- apply to the Sanctuary Scheme. Call 020 8313 4290.

TESTIMONY- a victim of domestic violence ‘Maria’ left her partner after he abused her verbally, mentally and physically for a year and a half.

The 42-year-old said: “He even raped me when I was pregnant.”

“I took it and took it and took it until he did something to my son and that was it.

“He wasn’t going to go through what I went through.

“My boy was a year old when I finally got out.

“The last time my partner hit me, he nearly killed me- nearly had me through windows.”

She went to court and got an injunction for him to keep away from her.

Maria gives talks to explain what happened to her.

She said: “I was sick of listening to people say ‘why don’t they just get out of it?’”

She is one of the speakers for Freedom Courses organised by Bromley Council, which is designed to show women they can move on with their lives, learn it is not their fault and gain confidence.