A funeral home in Erith has apologised after sending 20 grieving families letters asking them to collect their loved ones’ ashes years after their deaths.
Tender Touch Funeral Service said the letters were sent during an internal review of historical records after its database indicated cremated remains were still in its care.
But the funeral home has now admitted the correspondence was issued before the required manual checks had been completed.
Relatives of Victor Charles O’Brien were one of the families to have received a letter, despite him dying all the way back in 2000.
READ MORE: ‘My Bexley family got told my grandad’s ashes were ready – but he died 26 years ago’
Did your family receive a letter? Contact Ezekiel.Bertrand@newsquest.co.uk
His granddaughter, Lindsey Smith, said the family was left questioning whether the ashes buried at Hillview Cemetery in Welling were actually those of her grandfather.
She told the News Shopper: "My mum’s worried now. Do we actually have my grandfather here, or have we got someone else?
"I said he’d been dead since 2000, so why are they going back so far? If it was in the last five years, then fair enough, but not 26 years."
Lindsey said her family was later told the letter had been sent in error, after a member of staff went through historical records without the required second check.
She said the family was also initially told around 15 other people had received letters, while her sister was later told the figure was 20.
Tender Touch has now confirmed that 20 letters were sent before the final manual checks had been completed.
The funeral home said five of those records had already been resolved, including cases where remains had been collected or buried, explaining why different figures had subsequently been given to families.
A spokesperson said: "We fully appreciate the seriousness and sensitivity of this matter and, first and foremost, would like to reiterate our sincere apologies to Mr O’Brien’s family for the distress and upset caused by the correspondence they received.
"The letter was sent as part of an internal review of historical records relating to cremated remains that we believed, according to our database records, remained in our care for an extended period.
"Our procedure required these records to be manually checked against our Ashes Register before any correspondence was issued.
"Unfortunately, a number of letters were sent before those final checks had been completed.
"This was an internal procedural error, and we accept responsibility for the fact that the correspondence was issued prematurely."
Tender Touch said it subsequently reviewed Mr O’Brien’s records and its Ashes Register.
The funeral home said it had provided the family with a copy of the relevant ashes register record and, where appropriate, offered independent confirmation from the cemetery.
It added: "We understand the concern caused by receiving a letter suggesting that the cremated remains remained in our care when they had in fact been dealt with many years ago.
"We are particularly sorry for the distress this caused, given the sensitive nature of the correspondence."
The company said it had now strengthened its procedures so that no further correspondence relating to historical records would be sent without the relevant record first being manually verified against its Ashes Register.
It has also written to affected families to explain what happened, apologise, and provide information about the current status of their loved one’s cremated remains.
Tender Touch said: "We deeply regret that this error occurred and the distress it has caused.
"We hope that this response provides some reassurance that, in Mr O’Brien’s case, our records confirm that his cremated remains were correctly collected and subsequently interred in 2001, and that they have not been in our care during the intervening years."
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