A Welling car owner must have got a foul-smelling surprise when they checked their prize people carrier this morning.

The word “S***” has been spotted smeared across the back windscreen of a Peugeot parked outside a semi-detached house in Lovel Avenue – and by the looks of it, the swearword may accurately describe the material used in the prank.

The profanity is written in filthy brown-coloured letters more than a foot high, giving a mother-of-two some light relief on her nightmare journey to work.

Rachel Wilkins, 29, was waiting to pull out into Central Avenue after more than half-an-hour stuck in traffic in Lovel Avenue on her way to an appointment in Shooters Hill, when she saw the offending graffiti.

News Shopper:

The car was parked outside a house at the corner of Lovel Avenue and Central Avenue.

The sign language interpreter for Greenwich Council told News Shopper: “It looked very much like what it said it was.

“It was gross. Luckily I wasn’t close enough to smell it.

“It looked kind of like a revenge thing. I don’t think it was a joke and if it was it wouldn’t have been a funny one.

“I would not have found it funny if it was my car.”

Miss Wilkins, from Northumberland Heath, added: “I think it’s a bit depressing that this is what we see now.

“I really hope it wasn’t produced by a person. I certainly wouldn’t have wanted to get any closer.”

Is this your car or are you the prankster? Call 01689 885702, e-mail tim.macfarlan@london.newsquest.co.uk or tweet @NewsShopperTim