AFTER gaining a reputation as a bit of a hubby snatcher, all eyes were on Angelina Jolie’s latest romantic film role with Johnny Depp.

But Brad Pitt can rest at ease, as apart from a brief smooch on a Venetian hotel balcony, there’s barely enough electricity between the pair to power a Christmas fairy light.

News Shopper: Angelina Jolie as Elise Clifton-Ward and Johnny Depp as Frank Tupelo in The Tourist. Photo: Peter Mountain and GK Films

The Tourist stars the pouty Jolie as international woman of mystery Elise, oozing sexual charisma like a bitch on heat and leaving every man she happens to gaze at breathless and sweaty palmed.

Dripping in couture and priceless jewellery, she looks a million bucks and never walks faster than a London bus in rush hour traffic.

Tailed by the police and guided by her clandestine lover - billionaire super thief Alexander Pearce - she boards a train to Venice and befriends American tourist Frank Tupelo (Depp) in the hope of convincing her pursuers he is in fact her elusive squeeze.

Intoxicated by her supposed beauty, the bumbling maths teacher finds himself following Ange around romantic hot spots like a randy dog intent on humping any and every crotch fitting table leg which happens to cross its path.

News Shopper: Johnny Depp as Frank Tupelo in The Tourist. Photo: Peter Mountain and GK Films

But when vengeful gangster Ivan Deminov (Steven Berkoff) catches wind of Pearce’s location, Frank finds himself dodging bullets and fleeing gun-touting Russians across rooftops in his jim-jams.

The film is an odd follow-up for The Lives of Others director Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck.

While his previous Oscar-winning film was a thoughtful and engaging drama set in East Germany, The Tourist is its antithesis, sacrificing a half-decent story for stylish visuals and beautiful locations.

Jolie and Depp have fun with the silly dialogue given to them, but their talents are essentially wasted in a film whose depressing superficiality rapidly becomes tedious.

News Shopper: Johnny Depp as Frank Tupelo and Angelina Jolie as Elise Clifton-Ward in The Tourist. Photo: Peter Mountain and GK Films

It also suffers from a sort of identity crisis. Its attempts at genre crossing largely fall flat with neither enough action to make this an exciting thriller nor a believable romance to qualify this as a quirky rom-com.

Like reading a glossy magazine, it’s fun at times to flick through and ogle at the pretty pictures, but it will never leave you feeling anything more than dissatisfied.

The Tourist (12A) is out now.