4:48pm Thursday 18th January 2007
By Howard Scott-Tiller
WHEN it comes to the financial deals struck between the Premier League and the FA and the football clubs and the TV companies, my understanding borders on moronic.
But when I see cash to the tune of billions changing hands in the fight to show Premiership games, I can only assume the beneficiaries feel physically sick at handling so much wonga.
As a child I once walked the single mile from home to the toy shop with £12 of my hard-earned pocket money to buy a Star Wars spaceship*.
I was nervous about the journey so enlisted a friend as bodyguard to stave off would-be muggers and that was for a miserly £12.
Imagine being the guy who collects the billions? Don't walk done any dark alleys and by God, don't handcuff the case of notes to your wrist - do you really think a mugger will let you on your way rather than hack your hand off with a broken Becks bottle?
Anyway, the vile amount of money should have been handed over in coppers in protest at the daftness of the price.
Count that lot out, you money-grabbing, bonus claiming and billionaire big-wigs.' And who benefits from all this cash? Not the lower league clubs I can tell you.
While die-hard fans turn out to support their local side sheltering their nasty burgers from the rain in a bike-shed stand with a corrugated rood, those clubs with the cash lay on more prawn sandwiches for their guests of honour.
Another glass of champagne? Oh, don't worry about the football match, we call it the opium of the people. Not for your eyes really, too much mud and touching.' I feel a pinch of sympathy for the fans of places like Chelsea and Manchester United where season ticket prices are so ridiculously high you need to re-mortgage your house every year.
Soon there will be no families in the family enclosures and they will have to be renamed the daddy drives a Roll Royce enclosure.
Why not pour some of the money into non-league football so regular folk with regular wages can enjoy their beloved game in some semblance of comfort?
The rich get richer and the poor get destitute.
Come on non-league teams, get on a platform, shout your wares, demand some of that cash, stretch to the dream.
* The Star Wars machine in question was Boba Fett's Slave One spaceship. Must give all the facts because we are, forever, professionals.
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