I usually try to come up with five new and different thoughts every week. But today I make no apology for returning to a particularly annoying issue with number one.

1. I’m unbelievably frustrated at the ever-increasing inability of crown courts to organise themselves in any way at all. Unnecessary delays and appalling communication cost us all millions. If the public was aware just how much time and money is wasted there would be uproar. Mind you, no one in the legal profession will ever complain as the ineptitude leading to the delays simply serves to swell their bank balances still further.

2. What is it with people dropping their children off at school in the morning. How hard can it be to understand that getting your children out of the car on the pavement side is a better idea than pulling them into the open traffic? First, and foremost, it’s safer, but it has the added advantage of not holding everyone else up on their way to work. So simple.

3. I’m sure we can all agree that the chances of either the Lib Dems or UKIP winning a majority are so far-fetched they’re not worth considering. But Ladbrokes has got the Lib Dems at 500-1 and UKIP at 100-1, how do they figure those odds that way round? Clearly the best bet, if you can get anyway near reasonable odds, would be on a second election being required.

4. I love tulips, as does my mum, so being the dutiful son I decided to buy her a bunch when I visited at the weekend. Guess what the nice lady in the shop advised me – to stop the stems folding under the weight of the bloom all you need to do is put a copper-coloured coin in the water. Anyone ever heard of this, and if so, does it work?

5. I was told this week that all the wasps and bees we ever see are all females. Can that really be correct? Mind you, it would certainly explain a few things – after all, I’m always being stung by females!

Andrew Parkes, Editor

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