Am I being incredibly thick not to understand what the hell Deal Or No Deal is all about? I cannot for the life of me actually understand what all the fuss is about. The whole programme is so contrived and yet the audience seem to be completely sold on it.

They cheer and whoop for the contestant in a most bizarre manner. Are they drugged?

And as for Noel Edmonds in his paisley shirts, calling the banker on the oversized phone, he is creepy.

His pauses and looks to camera make me want to chuck a brick at the screen.