A place to turn in times of grief

10:59am Tuesday 25th April 2006

After losing their son in the Iraq war, Pamela and Gordon Rayment turned to bereavement service Greenwich Cruse for support. CHRIS JOHNSON spoke to the family and found out about expansion plans for the service.

WHEN Pamela and Gordon Rayment heard the tragic news of their son's death, the following weeks turned into a "whirlwind".

In the aftermath, relatives and friends called at the family home in Joan Crescent, Eltham, to pay their respects to Private Christopher Gordon Rayment.

The 22-year-old was less than a week away from returning home as he stood guard in Al Amarah, Iraq, on August 4, 2004.

His life was cut short after he went to open a heavy concrete barrier to let his fellow troops pass through in their 4x4.

As they drove through, a chain became caught on the vehicle, sending the barrier crashing down on the back of the private's neck.

Christopher's mother says her son, who was serving in the 1st Battalion The Princess of Wales' Royal Regiment, died almost instantly.

Following the full military funeral held at St John the Baptist Church, Well Hall Road, Eltham, on August 18, the devastated family tried to resume normal life.

It was at this stage, Mrs Rayment said she decided it was time to get help from Greenwich Cruse.

The mother of two daughters and grandmother of three grandchildren said: "I remember Chris said to me before he left for Iraq in the March of 2004, I will be back Mum'.

"Those words kept haunting me and I was finding little time to grieve myself because I was concerned about how everyone else was coping.

"My husband, my eldest daughter Mandy and myself all signed up for the service.

"It gave me the opportunity for one hour a week to talk to someone about how I was feeling, about Chris as a child, about those final words he said to me before he left."

The Rayments are just a few people out of the 175 who benefit from the service each year.

The Greenwich branch has now been running for around 22 years. It has a dedicated team of 20 bereavement volunteers, many of who are professional counsellors who collectively give up around 3,500 hours a year.

Branch co-ordinator and professional counsellor Phil Clarkstone, 40, is now hoping to extend the service.

A new training scheme is set to swing into action this week to begin the three-month programme to train 12 volunteers.

He said: "We are particularly keen to extend the service to help more people from ethnic-minority groups in the borough.

"We are keen to recruit bilingual volunteers who will be able to offer support to those who don't speak English."

On average, most clients will receive around eight one-hour sessions.

While the service receives around £34,000 a year from Greenwich Teaching Primary Care Trust, it also relies on generating money through fundraising and from donations.

If you want to volunteer, call 020 8850 0505.