‘Play it cool’ – my mum told me that.

Apart from ‘be yourself’ that has to rank number 1 for most common/ useless/ hard to decipher as a piece of dating advice.

But if it was rubbish why would we find that the second we send one post-date text too many, get a little needy about when we’re seeing a person, or want to move in with our partner NOW that they run a mile?

There’s obviously something about playing it cool that’s sexy, right?

I don’t think that sexiness comes from turning your phone off though, or being aloof as to when you can see a person again, or not being able to ask for commitment when you want it.

Playing games isn’t attractive (especially when the other person knows full well you’re waiting two hours inbetween replying to their texts intentionally).

What is attractive though is someone who builds their own life and doesn’t wait on other people.

So how about you only reply to their message when you have some down time, not the second they get in touch with you?

Fill your weekends with activities you love, then if they want to hang out with you, catch them amongst your schedule?

How about you build your own dreams, buy your own house, and don’t rely on anyone else to make you happy. 

Because making your life awesome solo is the surest way to organically ‘play it cool’ and become really hot to other people in the process. 

Hayley Quinn is a leading London dating coach. See what she does at hayleyquinn.com or get in touch with her at Hayley@hayleyquinn.com

 

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