An unsuspecting couple became the funniest people in Dartford during 15 minutes of side-splittingly funny fame.

We’d gone along to see ventriloquist Paul Zerdin at The Orchard Theatre on Wednesday, October 17.

And after proving that yes, he is incredibly talented, witty, good looking and second to none at turning lifeless puppets into hilarious, animated characters with a mind of their own, Zerdin set his sights on the audience.

Moving into the crowd, he had people screaming with laughter when he began “reading minds”.

Holding his hand over one woman’s head, we heard a funny, girly voice from nowhere say “Oh wow, he’s so gorgeous.”

Zerdin had us – and our voices – in the palm of his hand.

Picking one lucky (or unlucky depending on if you love the limelight or not) couple, Paul asked them to make their way on stage and after we’d had a good look at their faces, they were sent backstage.

Returning with fantastically comical masks over their mouths, the pair had been utterly transformed.

And then the truly brilliant new material Zerdin has been working on took the audience by storm.

Without moving his lips once, he created voices for the couple and set about putting ludicrous words in their mouths.

I can see why people sometimes accuse the volunteers of being stooges.

Every movement they made was simply hysterical with those crazy masks on, and us knowing they had zero control over what Zerdin would have them say next.

It was comedy gold, and the couple were great sports.

Surprised when they heard their new voices suggest getting up to dance to Dirty Dancing’s I’ve had the Time of My Life, they went along with it and gave everyone a great show.

And although the masked poker faces remained straight throughout, it was hilarious to watch their stomachs shaking with laughter the entire time.

I urge you not to miss out on this genius’ show next time he’s in town.

Visit paulzerdin.com