AFTER standing accused of using this column as a 'personal ad' to scout for women with self-pitying talk about my failing love-life, I would like to apologise unreservedly and categorically confirm this will never happen again.

In fact as I walked into the Ravensbourne Arms - alone - on a Friday night and nursed a pint of Titanic Cappuccino (£3) - by myself - I was feeling much more positive with high hopes of meeting that special someone.

This is after all "more than just a place to eat great food and drink great beer", according to its website.

And to a certain extent it's true. Complete with a foosball table, dart board, billiards table and a retro games machine featuring Street Fighter II, there are a myriad of activities to keep the mind occupied once you're bored of your burger, pint or girlfriend - if you're lucky enough to have one.

The same website rightly brags of being a "beautiful" venue. In fact, as far as pubs go I can think of few more attractive.

Classic-style photographs adorn the pillars along with beer bottles from across the last century. Meanwhile, deer heads poke out from the varnished wooden walls surrounded by a healthy portion of sensitively placed candles and fairy lights.

The staff are very polite and functional, the drink selection superb and the food menu short but with extremely generous portions of perfectly cooked British fare.

This all combines to make it all the more sad that nobody seems to appreciate it!

At 10pm on a Friday night the place should have been teeming with youngsters tanking up on cheap ale before heading to the Fox and Firkin across the road.

But sadly I found myself becoming more and more frustrated at the sound of a shrieky attention-seeking girl in leopard skin leggings (clear security issues according to the psychologist friend I later consulted).

Her voice echoed throughout the empty venue, completely dominating the pub's atmosphere.

In fact after a couple of large glasses of Abilius white wine (£4.35 each) I was seriously tempted to stray into the high street and drag people inside shouting "where are you going? - where could be better than here?"

But with that harassment charge still looming large I returned to my seat and ordered what is quite possibly the biggest portion of fish and chips I have ever seen.

The Ravensbourne Arms has all the right tools, tools in good working order and capable of providing a lot of entertainment and pleasure. But it's not much use without people. Kind of reminds me of my love life.

Damn it! Sorry. So close.

SERVICE **** Polite and efficient

DECOR ***** Stunning. Warm and cozy.

FOOD **** Best fish and chips I have eaten in London

ATMOSPHERE ** Too many echoes. Needs more people

PRICE **** Awkward location means cheap drinks

DRINK *** Huge variety of ales